Restraining Orders and Other Things

Dennis trashed Elizabeth's things. One was a big glass dolphin that she has had for years and loved...not something he had anything to do with. He broke her printer and her plotter. Today she went to court for the restraining order.

Then so he would have his truck and personal things she packed it all up, and put it in his truck. E.R. and John loaded up his tools and even the big tool box that sits across the bed of his truck that E.R. had given to him. They hooked up his boat and John drove it to Dennis' sister's place. E.R. and Elizabeth followed with Ashley as she had to go too. Not that we wanted her to. Hailey went along for support too. Ashley cried all the way there.

Dennis has more things here...a big screen TV, his computer and big computer desk, and other furniture. Elizabeth will see to it that he gets it all and just the way he left it. We don't trash other people's stuff.

The sister and ex wife are talking trash about my daughter. That is hurtful when all she did was give her time and money and love to Dennis and his children. What is wrong with people?

Hailey, Rose, and Reflections

Dorothy

A Minor Tragedy

Everything seemed to be going so well. Elizabeth and John have not gotten along for years, but they have been cordial to each other. I told each of them that the other one is my child and I love them both.

John is staying in the travel trailer. John was in an auto accident last winter. His back was wrenched and now he has a pinched disk. He needs an operation and today he is going to see a specialist and find out about an operation. John was working and trying to get his life back together when this happened. He took himself off state disability...not that they have paid him anything...so he could go back to work. He is in constant pain. In the past he has had problems with drug abuse. It cost him time with Hailey and a big part of his life. He is staying clean and determined to make things right.

Elizabeth has been living in my guest house with her boyfriend, Dennis, and his daughter, Ashley. Things for Dennis have been pretty good considering he is out of work. He had a place for him and Ashley to stay...and a nice place for his younger children to visit. He had a woman that not only loved him but cares about his children and she works! He did work hard getting our swimming pool patched up. Then E.R. Elizabeth and even the children helped with the pool. Dennis has beautiful intelligent children. They call me grandma. I haven’t met his oldest. It has to be hard for Dennis to be out of work when just a few months ago he was a working architect.

People let things get to them. Then they start drinking. Alcohol has ruined so many families. Dennis is spending a few days as a guest of the county now. After Elizabeth came over here and called 911, I got the two younger children and took them home to their mom. Dennis was going to drive away with them but was still in Elizabeth’s house breaking up her stuff. It took some convincing to get the children to go with me. Hailey went with us. I have a long palm lined drive to the road. I didn’t get out the drive way soon enough. Two sheriff’s officers were parked on the road and they talked to the children before we left. The boy had seen the fight and told the officer what happened. Dennis tried to drive out but my car was blocking the way and an officer stood in his way...then when I drove out the other officer drove into the drive way. His truck was blocked in. At least the children didn’t see their dad get arrested. The little girl cried all the way home. She loves us and was afraid that she would never see us again. Hailey hugged her and tried to reassure them both that we would see them again.

On the way back we picked up Ashley from soccer practice. She was in tears. Her dad had already yelled at her on the way to drop her off at soccer practice earlier and now this happened. From talking to Ashley’s mom when I dropped off the kids...Ashley can stay with us for awhile. They don’t get along. Until things get sorted. Hailey hugged Ashley on the way back and tried to reassure her that things would be all right and that she had a place to live.. Ashley was blaming herself. Once we were back in the house Hailey went to her room and cried. So it was time for her to get some hugs. Elizabeth said that Ashley has her room there and can stay.

I was going to take photos of Hailey yesterday...late afternoon...Hailey had agreed to pose. YAY! Sometimes things don’t work out the way you want them too. There is always today and hopefully tomorrow.

The Lily Pond at Balboa Park

While waiting for class to start, I spent a lovely time at the lily pond. The lilies are beautiful so couldn't resist taking photos. Most were straight on pretty shots.

Started to paint with a lens...trying to make the photo look more like an impressionist painting. Met a lovely lady while doing this. She asked what I was doing and wanted to see my photos. She told me her name was Carmin and that she worked at the Senior Center. She was on a break so we talked until she had to return. She takes care of her seven year old grandson during the week and I told her about Hailey.

This is my favorite from the lily pond.

Making Choices

My family grew up and left home. I managed and lived at a mini storage. A few years before that my husband and I broke up and he moved away. So I was often alone at the storage...sometimes one of my children would move back for awhile...

Then Hailey came to live with me. She was about 18 months old. Before she came to live with me I used to enjoy a glass of wine or two but quit. I was Hailey's sole caretaker and I needed to have my wits about me. If I had to drive us somewhere I sure didn't want to have any alcohol on board.

My mother's uncle...my Great Uncle Burt was an alcoholic. He went for several years not drinking but when he did fall off the wagon he would not drive. Many times he walked over five miles to get home. Then when he sobered up he would get someone to take him to where ever he left his truck. After I learned to drive I took hum to get his truck a couple of times.

Now we read in the news about two moms that caused deaths by drinking and driving. They have killed their own children. No matter how drunk a person is they can make the choice to drive or not. They can choose to not drink if they need to stay sober to protect the lives of others and themselves. So many families have been touched by drunk drivers. My own cousin was killed by a drunk driver that ran a red light and slammed into the driver's side of my cousin's car.

When I think about drunk drivers I remember my Uncle Burt walking home all those miles because no matter how drunk he was he was not going to kill someone by driving drunk.

Almost Full Moon

Balboa Park on Sunday

To get a parking place I came early and waited for my photo class to start. Went over to the rose garden and enjoyed the roses...took some photos to make up for not being in class last week. This one was on the way to the overpass...just waiting for me to see the opportunity.

Took several rose photos but when I was ready to leave saw this and a nice reflection across the street. Tried this several times and like this one best.

Looking for a round punch...

Here too...this looks so fake but I swear it is just like it came from the camera except for downsizing the file.

At the Alcazar Garden waiting to get started...snuck off and took some photos...

Three tiers...

Close as I got to the umbrellas at the Organ Pavilion. It is a beautiful location but from this photo doesn't look like it.

Dorothy

Stromy

Pretty doesn't make it art...

My mother was an artist...not a pro or anything. She painted off and on for years and just when she was getting really good she died. Something a few days ago reminded me of a time we spent together at one of those bulk art sales and so I was inspired to write.

Pretty doesn't make it art. Often we look at a pretty bright oil painting that looks well done. It might be a sunset or an old building overgrown with flowers or a beautiful landscape or sea scape and think how wonderful that is. The artist knows how to paint a pretty scene. And does it over and over until they can paint that scene without even thinking about it. You can look through stacks of these paintings at the "original" oil painting sales, and see the minor differences...sometimes there is a slight change in color tone. I remember when my mother and I, back in the early 1970s, looked through one of those "original" art sales. There were hundreds of paintings many the same scenes over and over. She called it quickie art. Hotels and Motels bought this stuff in bulk.

I saw some of this quickie art out in front of Wal Mart today, and I could see that it was pretty. I remembered Mama and that day so long ago, and I smiled. I think it is fine if someone likes one of these paintings and enjoys seeing it on the wall. Is it art? How can it be art when it is meaningless, emotionless, rote?

We can fall into this trap when we take photo after photo of pretty scenes just as every other person with a camera has already done before us. I like taking pretty pictures but that doesn't mean that I want to stay in that rut for the rest of my life and not stretch myself and learn to do more with my camera.

Digital photography is a whole new world. Taking photos for me in the past was about recording my growing family and the things we did and the places we went. That is important for me...not that the world cares a bit. We don't want to see someone else's family sitting around the table at Thanksgiving. We do want to look at those old photos of our own families. So I would never say that recording is not what photography is about, or that it isn't important. It just isn't art.

With our digital cameras we can do things we couldn't do before. Not because it was not possible, but because we were limited. We had 24 or 36 pictures on our roll of film and because we were not pros had to pay for printing. Polaroid excepted, we couldn't take a photo and then quickly see what we had done. We didn't want to make mistakes. With our digital cameras we can make mistakes until we learn. We can try new things and if they work, fine...if not we can try something else. We can spin the camera, move it to catch an impression of our subject, or change the aperture and shutter speed to catch effects we would not get with "normal" settings. We can create art. We can have fun with our cameras.

Pool

After lots of work and a couple of months the pool was finally ready for water. A little last minute sweeping and the water was turned on. Three hoses ran for several hours. We all guessed when the pool would be full. I said 4am...I was right on. While the water was running into the pool the kids did some sliding.

This shows the deep end of the pool finally getting enough water to swim a little.

I haven't been in yet!