Thursday, November 25, 2010

Thanksgiving

My mother made great Thanksgiving dinners. Once we had too many visitors for our little house and we had wooden boards placed on sawhorses for our table and a bed sheet for the table cloth. The weather was beautiful and sunny and perfect for an outdoor meal. My Dad and Marlise were there and two of Mama's friends from Washington state down for a visit. Both men from Washington, were a little bit in love with my mother. Mama wasn't married to anyone at the time. We had my Mama's friend Violet at dinner too. Her husband was away in the Navy.

I remember another Thanksgiving when my children were young and we lived next door to Mama and my last Stepfather. We called him Shorty. His name was Lee Roy Castleman. It was an easy walk to grandmother's house. Uncle Burt...Mama's uncle lived in her little house accross the driveway. My sister and her husband the their two sons were there and someone opened up a bottle of Cold Duck. Do they still have that? My sister's oldest son said, "Cold Duck and hot turkey." Everyone laughed and we remembered that through the years. I mentioned that today and my son David said he remembered when Jimmy said it all those years ago.

Back then I was living my life and not thinking that I was making memories. Sometimes I look back on all that has happened and I feel sad and a sense of loss. Things could have been a lot better. Mama could have lived to be 90 instead of dying at 57. We could have kept our house and not moved to Wyoming. E.R. had left me a couple of months before Mama died, and he got a job in Wyoming. I couldn't pay the bills. With Mama gone I didn't want to live next door anymore. So I agreed to go to Wyoming. We only stayed the summer and came back to Lakeside.

My Uncle Burt went into a home and so we moved into my mother's little house. The same one we lived in when we had too many people for Thanksgiving dinner years before. E.R. went back to Wyoming to work. One evening Shorty came over from Mama's house and told me that I was responsible for my mother dying. He said I had caused her to die. I was so upset I called E.R. and asked him to come back. We stayed  a little over a year and I went to beauty school. Then we moved to Ramona. I did like it in Ramona but then we only stayed two years. My Dad needed someone to manage the storage and so I took the job. My husband didn't want to do it. I said I was going with or without him. I had applied for a job at the Country Estates and finally was hired but it was too late. I was commited to move to the storage. Our marriage broke up three years later for the last time. We take care of David and Hailey and have a sort of friendship...Life can be so sad.

My first Thanksgiving alone was just me at the storage and some wine and very quiet. My kids were with their father. People invited me to dinner. My Dad and Marlise, my friend Janey, and my sister, all invited me...but I needed to be alone.

I was never totally alone at the storage after E.R. left.  My kids came and went. My father passed away two years later and I got to be friends with Marlise. Marlise and I began to spend time together and we had some good times. I think when my Dad was gone she didn't feel stressed with me because my Dad cared about me. I felt such a sense of loss when Marlise was gone. We were friends. I think it never gets easier. I cried so much at Mama's funeral and then we lost Uncle Burt and then my Dad. And during those years my Aunt and Uncle and my cousins and then Marlise's mom...who was the only grandmother I knew.

E.R. lived up in Ramona and then in an apartment in Lakeside and stopped drinking. Marlise let him rent the little house from her. She felt better with someone else on the place. Her mother came to live with her too. Then E.R. and I found out what was wrong with David. That brought us some bad times. It also meant that whatever we did we would never really separate and go our own ways...someone has to be there for David.

Then Hailey came. Marlise loved Hailey. We used to take her to lunch when she was just a toddler, Hailey and I had it good at the storage just the two of us. Marlise has been gone ten years now, and I live in her house with Hailey. I'm not as good at making Thanksgiving as my Mama was. But then when I was younger I did some pretty good dinners too. Even with the years gone I still hear the laughter from Thanksgivings past and the good times we had. So this is dedicated to my mother Lillian Elizabeth Ulery, my great Uncle Burt Byron Clark, My father Alfred Julian Toston, and my wonderful stepmom Marlise Dumser Toston.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Dawn and Cold Feet!

Up early again this morning. I decided to wait for sunrise outside but I got a little too cold for that. I came in and looked up sunrise on the computer. Computers and the net are wonderful!

So was back out with my camera just before the sun came up. The full moon was still in the sky in the west. This is the only photo I cropped. All were taken in raw and not edited.

Hide and seek.
We are surrounded by hills on three sides of our property. There are many new or newer homes on the hills around us. Some of them are pretty expensive. I love telling people that I live in Eucalyptus Hills. They don't have to know that our house is not much better than an old shack! We like it.
Someone's House

 Sunrise


The temptation is to keep shooting, but I'm not sure what the bright sun will do to my digital camera. 


Sunday, November 21, 2010

This Morning

The sky was clearing this morning.
Another view of the clouds.
Fluffy on top of our old wooden ladder...the ladder really is that tipped.

Now the sky is clouded over and we have rain on and off. Most of the storm is north of us and they say Northern California has lots of snow.

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Pouring Rain

The beautiful sunny weather from last week is gone...today was rainy and they say tomorrow will be rainy too. The kitties are staying in. They like warm and dry. My carport is leaking and I had my driver's side car door under the leak...and I usually keep the window down a little to keep the car from getting too hot...so it got a little wet.

Hailey just came back from seeing the latest Harry Potter movie with her friends. She said she cried at the sad part. Won't tell what because someone reading this might not have seen the movie yet. We had pizza for dinner and Hailey heated up some for herself. I'm trying to get her to start learning to cook...so far heating stuff up in the micro is her limit. I'm not a good example because I don't cook much anymore. I used to cook years ago and am not all that bad...if I do say so... I will be cooking Thanksgiving turkey.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Summer's Past...Love that place!

Jackie and I drove up to Summer's Past yesterday. We drank mango iced tea and looked through the gift shop and soap shop. I wandered around and took photos.

White flowers are so hard to photograph...for me anyway. In the sun they easily blow out and in the shade they look gray. I took several of this view and still not all that happy with this...

I see a view I want to capture and it never seems as good in a photo...this was pretty much the way it looked to me.

The stream flows through the grounds. I love the sound.

This view caught my eye.

The gift shop windows

Looking out the door of the gift shop.

I took photo of these guys in the past and never quite captured them. They are shaded and finally I think I did a bit better. Yes, I did Photoshop this.

Getting ready for Christmas. This tree is in the soap shop.

Leaving.


We were going to stop at the Antique Barn in Glenview but decided to go for food first. We drove to a wonderful Chinese resturant down in El Cajon and then decided we would visit the Antique Barn next week. Jackie needed the oil changed in her car so we went to a place that does that while you wait in the car. It didn't take long and we had a good time just talking. Then home.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Armistice Day-Veterans Day

Veterans Day is a national holiday and is the day after my birthday. My Great Uncle Burt Clark was at the front when the guns were silenced. Armistice Day was always important to him. He wasn't happy when they changed the name to Veterans Day. Times change and things change. We were in too many wars after WW1. It was a good thing to give all veterans a day of remembrance. Uncle Burt wanted to be buried at Fort Rosecrans National Cemetery in San Diego. It was closed many years before my uncle passed but we found that they had cancellations and it was first come for the places. It is a beautiful place. His grave is on the bay side of the point.

I always think of Uncle Burt on Veterans Day.

Uncle Burt was there when we were children. He baby sat us for our Mama. He taught us to play cards and told wonderful stories about his growing up in the woods of Washington, Oregon, and Northern California. I wish I could remember them all now. His mother died when he was a child. He had two younger brothers and two younger sisters. His father gave away the younger children. My grandmother was the youngest of all still a baby and she went to a home and was sort of adopted. His other sister was raised by grandparents. Burt and George the oldest of his younger brothers stayed with their father. Uncle Burt baby sat my children too.

Birthday again

Elizabeth took me to the Red Lobster for lunch. Love the food there and we had a great time talking. It is great to have a daughter and a friend all in one.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Birthday!

Another year older and....I'm still here! I am a little surprised that I made it this far. This last year started out scary and for awhile got scarier. Right now all is well and I am looking forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas. Not everything is going great...my son John, Hailey's dad, is back in the slam. Drugs again. He was out two years and couldn't quite get it together. He had lots of help and support but drugs take it all away. Meth is a life killer and Hailey was very upset about her dad. She is making it through this with lots of heart. She is a good kid...well most of the time...She has been missing school and we have to see her teachers on Monday. They want her to sign an attendance contract. She is also seeing a counselor at school.

I voted against pot last week...California is not going to make it legal. Though the idiots keep trying. I am not against the dying using pot to get through the bad times. I am against making pot legal for our kids to get into. John started out using pot and then meth. Both these drugs have not done him any good. If anyone thinks that marijuana is harmless they should read the information found here: Marijuana

The news is doing a series on OxyContin. My stepmother died of cancer. Toward the end they gave her a prescription for OxyContin. I was sent to the drug store to get the prescription. The doctor had made a mistake on the state form and the drug store couldn't fill the prescription. The form had to be taken back to the doctor and a new one signed. The doctor would not issue a new one without the first one being taken back. He had to account for every copy of the form so that the ruined form had to be sent back to the state. Now kids are getting Oxy from their parents, from other kids on the street, and from Mexico. All the restrictions from the past didn't do a bit of good to keep this drug from hurting our children. How will anyone keep our kids from being hurt by marijuana if it is totally legal?

My children grew up when meth became popular and easy to get. I talked to them about drugs. But I didn't know what crystal was. I remember telling my son John not to use it because it sounded dangerous. Of course I had also told him and all my kids not to use pot. A lot of good that did. It took awhile to find out what crystal was. John said that he wouldn't try it though his friend had some. I remember that friend. He was a nice kid that one day told me that he was going to marry my daughter when he grew up. A few years later his family did an intervention but it didn't get him off meth. He did time in Arizona and in California. I saw him about ten years ago and he looked really bad. I have heard that he finally got his life together. I would like to have hope that my son could do that too. Several of my son's friends fell into drugs. Some of them made it out a couple of them died. Some like my son are still sinking.

The day my stepmother died I took all her pill bottles and emptied them into the garbage including the Oxy.

Sunday, November 7, 2010

WAP

The name has been changed so that it is not actually WAP anymore. It is now the San Diego Zoo Safari Park. I had not been there since last year. So tonight I'm one tired cookie. I need to get out and walk a lot  more. Anyway had a lovely time with Gail. She was so nice about me being slowed down since my health problems. She is a lovely person and I very much enjoyed her company. I do have some photos.

Outside of gift shop. The photo does not really show the sparkle of the sun catchers.

Both the Zoo and the Animal Park have lots of flamingos near the entrances.

Giraffe skull. This shows that what seems like horns are actually bone and part of the skull. At another location there was a rhinoceros skull but I didn't take a photo.

We took a ride around the park. Since the mono rail is gone they have what they call a tram tour. We took that around the park. We got a good view of the giraffes. The tram is 30 minutes and while they do stop for pictures...have to be quick to take them.
The cattle are the decendants of the original ancestors of the long horned cattle brought to America by the Spanish. They became the Mexican cattle that were brought to Texas and mixed with other cattle that eventually developed into the colorful Texas Longhorns. They were on a hill above the road.

We did see some zebra but the view was limited. One bad thing about trying to take photos on the tram and also on the mono rail before is the time of day and usually being on the shadow side of many of the animals.

After the tram ride we walked to the lions.


Sitting up on his rock and trying to ignore us.

A keeper was hand feeding the lions treats through a heavy wire. She was walking away after eating treats. Taken through the glass.

He decided to get some treats and came over. I shot this through the glass.

We had some lunch and then headed for home through the big bird cage. Lots of shadows make it hard to get good pics, but this one was standing in the sun.

I drove home through Ramona. Was glad to be back home...I need to do more walking...

Friday, November 5, 2010

Descanso and Alpine

Jackie and I drove up to Descanso this morning. There was an antique sale there. Lots of old and interesting things. I saw an old wooden crank telephone. Back in the 1960s the old wooden phones were changed over to work on modern telephone systems. Years ago I almost bought an old phone until I found out that it had been changed over. Jackie asked and they said the phone was original so went ahead and bought it. I haven't taken it apart and looked inside yet...hope I'm still a happy camper when I do.

We drove home through Alpine and stopped for lunch at the Alpine Inn. Lovely food. I had a wonderful clam chowder. While we waited for the resturant to open we visited a nursery where there were lots of pretty flowers. I was glad I had brought along my camera. Here are some of the photos I took today.